You’re gonna miss them when they’re gone

Print Article

Innocent insects inspiring nothing but human ire.

Poor aphids.

The hordes of bitty bugs that descend on our region every autumn can be annoying, true. And if you peer at one through a microscope or your web browser, it can be a bit unsettling to see the long proboscis protruding from their buggy noggins, preparing to suck the lifeblood out of plants.

But the message here today is one of hope and goodwill. Itís an attempt to put your perspective in forward, rather than reverse. You live in North Idaho! When youíre embraced by warm, sunny days and surrounded by arboreal splendor that rivals the best fireworks on the Fourth, why, youíve got it good. Youíd better be able to see the bright side of aphid infestation.

Hereís a little help. We call it The Optimistís Brief Guide to the Practical and Aesthetic Benefits of these Beguiling Bugs:

• Aphids promote strenuous aerobic exercise in brief bursts. Watch people walking through a cloud of them and youíll see arms flailing, legs kicking and hips swinging. Jumping Jacks are a thing of the past.

• At no charge, an aphid assault will test your eyelid and gag reflexes.

• Hungry teens walking along the lake while talking to friends on their smartphones wonít be hungry for long. And the food is free!

• Aphid swarms have been known to deflect bullets from drug gangs and would-be assassins. Political scientists theorize they might be able to absorb the impact of ICBMs out of Pyongyang, saving untold millions of North Idahoans.

• Downtown retailers and street cops love aphids because they discourage loitering.

• Aphids provide free outdoors entertainment as an art form of perpetual motion.

• Aphid swarms are so thick, bald pates beneath them are sunburn-proof.

Now, isnít your aphid attitude a tiny bit better?

Enjoy this fabulous fall, bug blitz and all.

Print Article

Read More

THE FRONT ROW WITH JASON ELLIOTT: Not quite the season we wanted

August 24, 2019 at 5:00 am | Coeur d'Alene Press Getting that phone call on Monday night from Kootenai High football coach Doug Napierala left me feeling a little nostalgic. Here we are, the start of the high school football season ó coming next F...

Comments

Read More

NIC SOCCER: Cardinals go 1-1 in friendly matches

August 24, 2019 at 5:00 am | Coeur d'Alene Press • MEN TUKWILA, Wash. ó Mac Stultz scored on an assist from Kai Flugel in the 24th minute to send North Idaho College past the Edmonds Tritons 1-0 in its second game of the Northwest Athletic ...

Comments

Read More

Bonner County enters Festival at Sandpoint gun fray

August 24, 2019 at 5:00 am | Bonner County Daily Bee SANDPOINT ó Bonner County is wading into the simmering feud over the Festival at Sandpointís prohibition of weapons at its annual summer concert series. The Festival announced at the start of this s...

Comments

Read More

Clarity essential to understanding cost of bonds

August 24, 2019 at 5:00 am | Coeur d'Alene Press When taxpayers are asked to vote on a $70 million school bond, they deserve accurate facts and honest disclosures about costs from their school board. Iím aware of the discussion about the cost to ta...

Comments

Read More

Contact Us

(208) 664-8176
215 N. Second St
Coeur d'Alene, Idaho 83814

©2019 The Coeur d'Alene Press Terms of Use Privacy Policy
X
X